March 25, 2009

This one time...I had the bejesus scared out of me....

The other day as I was cleaning. (shocking, I know)

I found this on the wall in the hallway.

It annoyed me to no end.
I tried to clean it with some soapy water. But apparently the "artist" used ink.
I was really annoyed now. My mind started rolling...(mine rolls sometimes) who would do this? My girls? NAH. They KNOW me. They KNOW how much this kind of stuff peeves me.
THEY know I would MAKE them clean this PLUS tons more stuff.

So, who would do this? One of their friends?

They know me too.....must have been a friend though, trying to be cute.

This is NOT cute. This is the kind of little annoyances that get me...

but I tried to remember, this is little. and it is a heart.

It did not flip my lid. I let it slide. I have not said anything to anyone...(except for the whole internet world) this is a change for me.
A few years ago I would have made a stink about it.
The old me.

It reminded me of a childhood memory that was locked away in a vault.

I had a good friend named Kim who lived a few houses down from me. We were besties.
Her Mom was divorced and Kim had a younger brother too.

We were friends from about age 5 to 11.

Kim's mom got married and they moved to a really nice house a bit further from us when we were about 9.

Their new home was gorgeous. I mean gorgeous, it was palatial compared to where we lived.

They had a fancy living room that was all white and yellow. (this was the 70's)
White carpet. White couches. Yellow/white wallpaper.

Just unreal from my view.

They even had a POOL.
Built in....not the "out of the ground" one like my Grandma had.

My Mom would drive me to Kim's house to spend weekends with her.

Kim's Step dad was not such a friendly guy from what I remember.

He was an attorney, that was all I remembered about him.
Well, that and this incident right here:

One day when she and I were about 10, Kim, myself and her little brother were playing in their pool.

Kim's mom was in the house, but keeping an eye on us via the big glass sliders.

One of us grabbed a bucket off the patio, brought it into the pool...then we made up some sort of game with the bucket.

Playing like good kids. We were not being noisy...just having fun.

Kim's step dad came out near the pool and checked on us.

I watched as this man transformed from a normal person into a "DEVIL."
He started screaming at us all at once.


I was shocked. I remember this terrible feeling come over me. This sudden fear...

I was used to hearing my Dad scream. That was normal.

But now this man, this stranger was yelling at me and my friends.

What was he yelling about? Why was he losing his temper? Something major?

He was yelling because there were THREE LEAVES IN THE POOL.

Apparently the bucket, had a few leaves in it when it was put in the pool.

The THREE LEAVES were on the bottom of the pool now and this man was losing his freakin' mind about it.

I won't deny, that I probably peed in the pool at this moment. (he is lucky there was not poop now to add to the leaves)

He told YELLED for us to get out NOW.

We had to dry off and go inside. He made myself and the little brother go to his room and my friend Kim go to her room.

He came into each room and asked WHO put the leaves in the pool.

He demanded an answer. He was talking to us like we had murdered someone.

I was 10 years old. The little brother was about 7. We were scared out of our minds.

NONE of us could answer him.

We were terrified....scared of what was to come next....

I think he made us stay in there for about an hour.

Then Kim's Mom finally let us free.

I just remember being so freaked out by the whole scenario......

That may have been one of the last times I ever visited Kim.

I moved to Georgia shortly after that.

About 7 years later we read that this man; the lawyer; the Stepfather had killed himself.

I was never able to contact Kim....I still think about her now and then.

Oh, and don't you know who brought the bucket into the pool.......


But I did not know there were leaves in it. I swear. Don't yell at me.

I also did not draw a heart on the hallway wall. Pinkie swear.


  1. You poor thing, you had to have been traumatized by him. It's hard not to get caught up in the material world. I remember how my grandmother would refluff each couch cushion as soon as we got off it, and God forbid we actually lean on one of the pillows. Her house was always so cold and impersonal. I've always wanted my home to feel warm and friendly to anyone who walked through the door. I'm sorry about the heart, but the artist obviously wanted to express how much love was contained within them! lol

  2. It's funny what shapes us in our childhood and what we actually remember... There is no decade devoted to psychos, they exist everywhere and at all times.

    My stepfather was one of them. Only I wasn't so lucky that he killed himself.

    Use a Mr Clean magic eraser for that wall mark :-)

  3. Dern... I've known ppl that just never got their lives in gear too. What a sad person! Wow.

    I think that's funny about the heart. Although it's not funny in some ways. I would have a cow if something got drawn on my walls too. My whole house has been painted within the past 3 to 4 years so to me it's all still 'new'. But we even taught our kids not to drag their hands down the walls when they walked down the halls because it makes a mess of them. (and I still clean smudges off the walls and switch plates on a regular basis because I don't like them to look dirty) Our little man would hold his hands STRAIGHT out in front of him walking to the bathroom to wash up after dinner so he wouldn't touch anything. Un-necessary messy stuff flips my lid sometimes too!

    But remember...somebody 'hearts' you today! : )

  4. It's pretty amazing what can flip some people out. Three leaves in the pool? I grew up with someone like this and I have always tried to understand the causes and why's for his being this way. I still haven't really figured it out.

    I think it's easy to get caught up in the smaller pictures...letting the small things be big things. It's one thing to be upset or bothered by something small but to flip out and lash out at everybody around you is another. I'm not really for flipping out over even big things, but that is just me. That's not saying I never do or have though.

    I think it's awesome that the new you didn't freak out. Yes, a heart written on the wall is annoying but in the big picture of life of what is important to you and keeping your home the sanctuary that you have created it to be for your family, not freaking out is taking the higher road. The thing is freaking out wouldn't take the writing off the wall.

    I have been writing this post in my head over this past week about things like we respond to the small things in life and how we affect those around us with how we respond. I am sorry that this man treated you in this manner and it really is traumatizing when people scream at us. Just so you know, I knew it was you that brought the bucket into the You were wise to keep you mouth shut...who knows what this crazed man would have done to you. Scarey. It somehow doesn't surprise me that he killed himself. (sorry for such a long sparked what I was already thinking about :)

  5. That is so sad.... poor Kim. Imagine living with a father like that. :(
    I had a friend in Charleston named Laura whose Dad was an alcoholic and he would come in and start yelling at her (and me, when I'd be there for a sleepover) in the middle of the night. He'd be slurring his words but still REALLY scary to a little kid.

    I'm sure you did pee in the pool from fear. I would have too.

  6. What a sick and tormented man! I feel so bad that someone would feel the need to scare little kids that way! Now about that heart - can you sand it off lightly and touch it up with paint?

  7. Suzanne, There's so many 'stories' in that story, funny and serious. The thing that stands out in my mind is the fact that money and possessions don't bring happiness. When your friend and her mother and brother moved into that new, fancy-dancy home--they were probably thrilled to death to have such a fabulous new home and life. But--I'll bet that it wasn't long before those three people 'wished' they had not made such a decision. The father obviously had MANY problems--most of which made the family miserable. How sad is that! Wish you could find Kim.

    Glad you didn't 'fuss' at the family for that little heart.. That's a message --all in itself.


  8. What a terrible thing for a grown man to do to such small children.
    Sometimes (white) toothpaste will take writing off the wall.

  9. Daaang that's a scary story ! My kids have done that whole "draw on the wall and it's not me" thing too. Never anything the magic eraser (or a can of killz and paint) couldn't fix. The funny thing is, they would write their own name and then SWEAR it wasn't them.


  10. Poor Kim! Imagine having to live with that monster - never knowing what might set him off.

    Magic Eraser!

  11. wow... quite a story. just reading it brought the fear... the shame of doing something wrong, even if youweren't sure you did. and you have never found kim? did you try the dreaded facebook? hmmm... maybe someday.

    perhaps now would be the proper time to apologize for drawing that little heart on your wall... while eric was stealing your silverware...

    nah, just kidding :)
    but i think that mr. clean magic eraser will remove it. it really is magic :)

  12. I am PROUD of you for not fussing over that little tiny heart! I'm sure that was hard. My husband used to be a bit like that crazy man and I do believe it was a direct gift from his own crazy father. It took us a lot of work to diffentiate respecting things from valuing them over people. My house is so messy and torn up, that we will probably go full circle and my kids will end up being like your friend's dad.

  13. The heart thing would really piss me off, but since you don't know who did it.

    I'm wondering where Kim's Mom was when all the yelling was going on? This is such a sad story.

  14. this was a very funny story!! at least we know you are sane and nice enough not to yell at the person who drew the heart!

    this also shows that the meanest people are often the sadest... which is very sad

  15. You, young lady, are NOT allowed into my pool with a bucket! OR, a leaky bladder... I guess we'll just have to sit alongside and have drinks.

    Magic Eraser:)

  16. Aww, Suz, what a an awful man. Did you read that Sylvia Plath's son killed himself on Friday? People's own inner demons are their worst enemies.

    But, Kay is right....somebody hearts you today. Coach probably did that because he knew you'd see it and wanted to make you feel even more special. The Mr. Clean stuff is magical.

    Oh, and I pee in the ocean. We can be pee-pee besties now. :-)

  17. That man had a lot of rage inside.

    I'm so glad you found that little heart BEFORE Flat Caroline got there, because that's the kind of thing she might do.

    You need to contact Kim. :)

  18. Good for you. You need to leave that heart there as a reminder of what is important.

  19. Magic Eraser!!

    What a sad, little man to terrorize children like that. Especially one that wasn't even his!! Well, I guess technically, none of you were "his," but you know what I mean. Obviously, he had bigger issues, such as mental illness, to deal with, but still, it's just wrong.

  20. you really should try to find kim on facebook, she may need you since she has come into your thoughts.. i like to believe spiritual things like that.... anywhooooo~ try to think of it as a sign of love on the wall. heehee you KNOW they'll NEVER own up to it.
    but good job not flipping out.

  21. I think I also would be scared to death by some man yelling at me for three leaves in a pool. I'm proud of you for keeping your cool about the heart.

  22. Is she on facebook? So you know what is funny? I can't stand people like that. There is NO REASON to act like an insane lunatic over stupid little things like that. But I find myself starting to freak out about stuff like that all the time. I have to give myself a swift kick in the pants and remind myself that it is uneccesary to act like that about trivial things. I don't act like a lunatic but i do get witchy. I am so glad you don't : ). You are so cool.

  23. WoW! Sounds like he needed a little decaf! I am sure it was more than leaves in the pool that made him so mad that day....I am sure your friend just wanted to die when he went off!

    As for the heart...that sucks...but at least it isn't something you have touch up paint? I always try to save a little :)

  24. You must have felt so awful about that darn leaf!!!

    Have you tried a little Shout or Spray N Wash to get the heart off your wall? That's worked wonders for me with crayon and other ink. Let me know if it works. It is a very cute heart though but that would drive me nutso. I used to be very, very clean and anal. 3 kids will knock that trait right out of your personality though! I still see all of the marks on my walls and it still bothers me somewhat but I figure I'll have a nice clean house when the kids are older. My friends always comment how clean my house is and I think they're crazy because it always looks dirty to me.

    When I was 5 I went next door to my friend Renee's house. It was Easter time and Renee and I were playing with red lipstick. I went into the bathroom to try to wash my hands but there was a really pretty dress in there. All wet from being cleaned. There weren't any towels in sight. Can you guess what I did? Um yes, I wiped the red lipstick on that dress. Oh yes I did. Her Mom didn't yell at me but I think I was sent home.

    Much love from NJ,

  25. Mr. Clean magic eraser does the trick, I left the crayons out once, once. My 2 and 3 year old wanted to paint on the wall like mommy. So I erased the planes and the treehouses and everything else those giant circles represented to my daughter. But i tell you it doesn't work on dried boogers!! That takes elbow grease!!

  26. SCARY! I used to get to upset when my friends' parents would get mad while I was there. Once my friend was chasing me around his house and I got up on the bed...standing...and his dad flipped!!! I ran crying out of the room and didn't go back for a long time.

  27. I could literally feel your fear. I hate when I yell at my kid, just hate it. I know I need to be strict at times but I know there are moments that it scares her and it makes me feel like crap every time. Nothing gets accomplished through yelling, nothing.

  28. Suz, I was completely riveted by this story. Everyone I think has something similar in their childhood. Like you said, you were used to your dad shouting, but this strange man...scary. So sad when you look back as an adult and you know more about what might have been going on.
    Really great post.
    PS I think that heart is cute. I'd keep it.

  29. I know what you mean about the "old" you, and the "new" you...I have aspects of my character that have changed like that, too. The best part is that you were aware of it, thought about it, and got a blessing (instead of anger) from that little heart!
    Okay, the stepfather story is scary and sad. I am sorry, but I found the peeing in the pool part funny...his angry outburst made the pool "dirtier" than a few leaves would! But I guess when we are mad, we don't see clearly. Poor soul. I hope your friend is having a good life, wherever she is.

  30. OMG that's scary and so sad. Hard to believe there are really people out there like this. Can't imagine if he knew you peed in the pool. You may not be alive today.


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