February 20, 2013

Crack and cracks in communication.

It's not that often that I get mad at one of my girls.
But I got mad at Linds on Monday night. And it wasn't even about her being addicted to crack.
I know.
Oh wait,  you don't know.
Whenever one of the girls does something to irritate me, I say to myself: Well, at least she is not smoking crack.
In my mind everything is good if my child is not smoking crack. {And by crack, that includes oxy, coke, meth, pot, cigarettes etc.... Crack is my word for drugs.}
I'm not even going to tell you what made me so mad, because it would not matter to most people. But remember, I compare most things to crack.

Oh, wait. I'll have to tell you or this story makes no sense.

The child had the nerve to leave a bowl of brocolli on the counter.
I asked her at 6:30 to please cover the broccoli and put it in the fridge. When Coach and I arrived home at 11:30, it was still sitting on the counter.

I know.


As good as we are about communicating around here, sometimes the communication falls through the cracks. And by cracks, I'm talking the Grand Canyon.

Monday, the Coach and I had tickets to see Kid Rock and we were being joined by another couple. I texted Coach around 4:00 asking what time we needed to leave the house. He replied: 6:30-6:40.
I run home, and start preparing dinner.
Coach walks in at 5:40, sees me working in the kitchen and says: "We are meeting so and so for appetizers and drinks before the show..... I guess I should have told you this?"

Me: "ahhhh yeahhhhh." as I start putting the food away, meanwhile my brain was busy cussing him out.

Two minutes later, Linds walks into the kitchen and I'm grumbling. "the lack of communication around here is insane...grumble grumble...."

Lindsay: "What? What happened?"

Me:  "I assumed I needed to cook dinner before we go to the concert tonight and Daddy didn't tell me we were eating out with so and so."

Lindsay: "Wait. What? You are going to a concert? What concert? Nobody tells me anything!!"

Lindsay: "Wow the lack of communication around this house is ridiculous."

I was now dizzy from going in that full circle.


Tuesday after school, I was fussing at Linds for leaving the broccoli out on the counter, and for not turning off the tv before she went to bed.

Lindsay: "I'm sorry Mom. I forgot. But really, if you think about it, you could have come home to me sitting in a pool of blood while holding a ouiji board and candles lit in a circle around me.  Just think what that blood would do the grout. AND at least I put away all my drugs and alcohol before I went to bed."

Lolo overheard this and stated dryly: "That is the scene in the beginning of every CSI show I've watched." 

Crack, cracks and cracking me up. Life is never boring.



  1. You went to see Kid Rock??? I am so jealous... He's coming to our town soon, but I have nobody that would want to go with me. Boohooo... And that lack of communication - sounds very,very familiar.

  2. I am glad you didn't get too mad about the broccoli : ) Life is way to short. Ain't nobody got time for that. Sometimes I wonder if someone peed in your cheerios.

    Glad you had a fun night out EVEN if your broccoli was ruined.

    Happy Wednesday to my favorite Florida Mommy!

    I am going to see lots of crack smokers today and I will think of you every time I see one : )

  3. and now I am dizzy!!! perhaps you have given up being a basket-case and have turned your family into crack-pots? :)

    if you ask me {i know, you didn't!!!} but i would blame it all on the pig.

  4. Isn't it wonderful to be able to laugh about stuff - - even when it's irritating at the time - - - cuz some stuff is not important enough to get upset about - - and you all recognize that. We truly do have wonderful families and in spite of their (and our) faults, we are blessed, blessed, blessed beyond words!

  5. I love that your girls know you so well!!

  6. I think I might need a kitchen pig.

  7. I'll bet the pig just laughs at everything going on- he knows all.

  8. Linds put it all in perspective, didn't she? I need to have your outlook: at least my boys aren't on crack...that I know of. They don't tell me anything, & I'm always the last to know things!

  9. Ah communication! Lack of it is so frustrating!

  10.'s only broccoli. Hope you enjoyed the concert. And the appetizers. And especially the drinks.

  11. Well---at least, you finally proved to me that life isn't always perfect at your household.... You are HUMAN my dear... Life is crazy. We all just do the best we can.

    Your girls and your hubby are AWESOME... Cherish them and celebrate the good stuff....

    Communication???? Who cares? ha ha


  12. God, I love your crazy family!!!


  13. I'm old enough to remember a comedy show (radio and TV) called Life of Riley. Have you considered Life of Suz?

  14. Hahahaha! Annnnnndd guess what's on the TV right now? CSI ;) She's right. I'm sorry about the broccoli. Communication's not so great in this house either ;)

  15. You guys are the frickin' best ever.

  16. You have me laughing! John always assumes that I can read his mind!

    Enjoy the afternoon.

  17. I love the way your mind works!

  18. Your house sounds just like my house. I was thinking how glad I was that I wasn't the only one upset about broccoli being left out.
    There's lots of cracks about crack around here too. But Linds got me with the ouiji board crack! Hilarious!

  19. I've missed you, and am so glad to come over and find you still keeping it real, and funny, at the same time.
    Love to you and all of your family, Suz! xoxo

  20. I KNOW I need a kitchen pig! The not communicating thing must be going around. We've got a bad case of it in my family with the worst offenders being my parents. 2013 seems to be off to a very odd start.

    By the way, I still chuckle over your post about leaving notes for your girls and the one saying something like "for Mrs. Pattmore, this would be a day off". Funny.

  21. Now more then ever I think I need a Kitchen Pig :) Life is full of moments when we can get mad about the brocoli..the trick is to know when to let it go! You are such an amazing Mama :)

  22. oh thank goodness! i thought you were going to talk about butt crack. i saw enough of that in class yesterday.

  23. those are my girls... the same scarcastic sense of humor as their ma'ma... Oh how I love that household. Laughter everywhere


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