It's windy in HERE.

Earlier this week I learned {from Face Book} that we had a cone of uncertainty heading our way. 

Me: What? 

A hurricane?

This cone, 

NOT this cone:

I had no idea .....I avoid almost all news media...so, this was NEWS to me.

Yep. I get my news from face book.

Please don't worry though....I DON'T get my political  info from face book.... I wait for the recorded phone calls.

I approve this message. 

\

I will be checking in with this site for my weather information.

We don't really freak out about hurricanes. I usually only freak out about someone being oblivious to recycling
or {gasp} talking with food in their mouth!

We will wait to freak out until it is time to freak out.

No need to waste energy freaking out before a freak out is necessary.

I won't freak out until I see Jim Cantore at my front door. Then the freaking out will begin. 

Then again, Jim won't show up here because:
 (a) I don't live ON the beach and 

(b) I don't live IN a trailer park. {anymore}

So. In more important news:
Do you ever wonder if you might be a candidate for botox or some other type of poisonous filler?

Me too:

Yep, I am a candidate, but I won't be going there.
This year.

 Is that scary or what?
No makeup....and I shared with you my angry face. Not to be confused with my constipated face, although they are pretty much the same.

 But I did have my first ever chemical peel this week.
Actually, I had my acid trip chems a few hours prior to this hideous photo.
*tapping inner elbow*

If I were able to have a do-over...I'd like someone else's neck.

And then the next day, I got a lot of my hair cut off.
Seriously, I am feeling lighter already what with all the dead skin falling off as well as snipped follicles.

Raise your hand if you can guess how many people noticed that I had several inches of my hair cut off as well as highlights.

If you guessed ONE. You'd be right.
And SHE didn't even notice until 5 hours after we were together. 

Does anyone around here even LOOK at me? HELLO??
I was under the impression that I was just eye candy around these parts, but apparently I am morphing into someone who has values.
And by values, I mean cooking and cleaning.

p.s. I hate that last photo of me...I look like Pinocchio.
And if Gepeto were to be my padre, I'd have better legs!

See how I made this post all about me? Yeah, thats what THEY get for not noticing me anymore. Next thing you know, I'll be getting a tramp stamp tattoo and buying a corvette. gag. 

Happy Friday!
Hopefully Florida won't fly off the map this week.  Cause if it does...you'll lose all of this free entertainment!

XOXOOX