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January 13, 2010

A means to the end….no matter how silly you look while getting there.

In July of 1996, we were living in Phoenix and our Lo just turned 3 years old.

Isn't that just the funnest age ever?

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My Mom flew in for a few days from Atlanta for a visit.

Mom took Lauren to the mall for shopping and girl time.

They headed out for the day and returned several hours later.

When I asked how everything went, Mom replied: "We had a good time…"

and then under her breath she said ever so discreetly:

“Lauren kept swallowing the gum I was giving her."

ME: ??? You gave her gum?

YOU gave her More than one piece OF GUM?

I am sure I rolled my eyes at her and called her a lunatic as well…that is how we roll.

I had never given her gum…because I KNEW, well, I just KNEW.

Yes Mom, I know you are a GRANDMA and Grandma’s have their own set of rules.

Anyhoo..

That evening, all of us are sitting at the dinner table having a nice meal.

We noticed that Lo was getting kind of squirmy.

Well, she was always a wiggle worm, but she was acting as though she was uncomfortable.

She was picking at her food.

She was wiggling.

Picking.

Wiggling.

squirming.

wiggling.

squirming.

She was acting weird.

wiggling.

squirming.

Picking.

She put her fork down.

She continued on with the squirming, but never said a word.

After a several minutes of this, she finally got up from the table.

I asked her what was wrong and she said: “nuttin”

She then proceeded to do the weirdest thing I have ever seen her do.

She got down on the kitchen floor…and laid on her belly.

She then reached both of her arms back and grabbed her ankles.

(are you picturing this? at this moment I am visioning some sort of yoga future)

So she has her ankles in her hands…and she starts rocking back and forth..on her tummy!

We stare at her…we make questionable faces to each other and then stare back at her again.

We were all thinking: WHAT THE HE…..

and then we **hear** it.

She let out a generously loud f*rt.

We busted out laughing.

She just smiled, got up and went back to eating her dinner… like this is how everyone gets rid of unwanted gas.

Doesn’t it take 7 years to pass a piece of gum?

Surely, it is out of her system by now… there is still a bit of gas passing in this house…only no one ever gets on the floor to do it!!!!



33 comments:

  1. Oh my gosh, how did you recover from laughing?? I am cracking up right now! This is such an adorable story, does Lo love it as much as you do??

    Kids are incredible, I love them.

    Vive la Lo!

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  2. IF I try her method and get stuck, would you bring me another piece of gum around noon? Thanks.

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  3. PS - 3 yr. olds really are the funniest things ever.

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  4. You mean that's not the normal way???

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  5. Your 3 year old is adorable. And yes they are a hoot. Haven't figured out a lot of things yet and are still funny all the time. : )

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  6. no no no NO! That is impossibly funny!!!!

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  7. your family makes me laugh :)
    and of course more than one piece of gum! once one is gone you need another :)

    and yes... three is the funnnnnest!
    i love that pic of lo! i am busily going through pics myself... putting together a book for my oh-so-close-to 16-girl. busily and quickly, because of course, this is practically the LAST minute!

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  8. That's something that concerns me EVERY TIME I take a yoga class......Bwahahahahaha!!!

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  9. so that's the trick to get that trapped gas out, lol! only a 3 year old

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  10. hahahahaha! I am laughing soo hard! Thanks for making my day Suz!

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  11. I do believe that is a yoga move.....
    and that is Definitely a result of that move.

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  12. But that is normal for all the crazy stuff kids do! Shame you didn't have a camcorder on hand - that would have been a $100,000 winner on America's Most Funniest.

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  13. Fabulous--truly a fabulous post!!!

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  14. SOOO FUNNY! I really would have been like "wtf!" ha ha, Kids are so funny!

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  15. That's a great picture of 3-year-old Lo. I think your story is hilarious, but I suspect Lo no longer finds it as funny as the rest of us do.

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  16. This is a super-cute story, but Suz, she is going to want to shank you when she reads this (Lo, not your mom)! XOXO

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  17. Oh. My. Gosh. This is the funniest story ever in the whole the world. I wish it would have been videotaped : ) Maybe you can get her to reenact it now: ) No? Oh.

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  18. LOL Horses do the same kind of dance when their tummys need to be ummm relived!

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  19. There is no way I could have held it together through that! Absolutely hilarious!

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  20. What a hoot! I'm laughing as I visualize her yoga moves!

    Oh, and we aren't supposed to swallow gum?

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  21. that's how we do it in this house too.
    that kid's got class.
    i knew it.
    :-)

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  22. OH MY--this post made my day! I really needed a huge laugh! TOO CUTE!

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  23. That is freakin' hilarious!! I'm guessing she won't appreciate this post as much as the rest of us.... ;-)

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  24. Hilarious story! And such a cute 3 year old.

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  25. How CUTE!!! And, oh, she was precious (looks-wise, too, I mean)!

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  26. So cute! Don't you WISH you had that on video??!

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  27. Are you still alive after sharing that story with the cyberworld? Because it's hurt-my-stomach-laughing funny, but probably not to Lo. Of course it's the perfect "behave or I'll tell your boyfriend" story....

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  28. THAT is a phenomenal photo, BB!

    The story, um, a bit disturbing.

    That's one reason I love your blog, I never know what you'll be talking about from one day to the next! LOL!

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  29. Three and four are really fun ages! Love the photo, Suz, but I don't think it's possible to have ever taken a bad shot of your beautiful family!

    SHE was a genius!! How on earth did she know that would work? Really?!

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  30. Oh this is a funny one. Can just see little Lo arockin' & af*rtin'!! Whatever made her think of that move?! (Did she see a grownup do it earlier??) Hey, give me a few minutes, but I want you to come over to my blog and pickup an award...I'm not done posting at this time though. Have a great day! X-C

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  31. We all need to stop and learn from three year olds every now and then.

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  32. Oh how funny!!!!! BUT---you have some fun ahead of you, Little Friend. When you get to be 97 (like my pop-in-law), you can fart as you walk---each step of the way... Guess that either keeps him warm, or gives him enough steam to keep on walking!!!!! ha ha

    Hugs,
    Betsy

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