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October 04, 2010

My *Jesus* Lizard

 

As a kid, I played outside. A lot.

I spent hours and hours in our yard or roaming the neighborhood.

I loved catching bugs and other stray cats, bunnies critters…but catching lizards was my forte’.

I caught them all the time…loved them so much. I was the lizard whisperer. 

When I was about seven I found this beautiful bright green lizard….and he seemed to love me as much as I loved him.anolea1

He crawled up and down my arms, and he loved sitting on my shoulder.  Parrot lizard.

He was my constant companion for a full day. I had visions of our life together…playing all the time, traveling the world.

I found a jar and made him a home for the night in my room. 

The next day, I thought it would be a great idea to take him to school with me. Surely, he would get lonely at home all alone.

Being the girly tomboy that I was, I put him in my purse and headed for school.

I only shared my new lizard with a few friends that day…I did not want to risk getting into trouble. (I think I had hit my quota for classroom spankings already!)

Sadly, that night my lizard died. I was crushed.

It must have been the long commute on the school bus that did him in. I could barely stomach it myself.

Devastated, I buried him in the yard. I performed the private eulogy that he clearly deserved.

A few days later, I went to pay homage to my now deceased friend and he.was.gone.

The burial site wide open…my lizard had risen from the dead!

Like Jesus. 

It was a miracle of epic proportions! He lives! He lives! He lives!

I was astounded. For days I looked for him, but sadly we were never reunited.

I never forgot our time together, he was a great pet.

 In hindsight, maybe he was not so much‘Jesus like’ as much as my cats were excellent excavators.

Oh snap.

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I was a mini hawt mess.

34 comments:

  1. ok - besides the EWWWW factor (from this girly girl that can get dirty but can't stand creatures) this was a cute story and cleverly told! Oh snap, those darn cats...

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  2. I love this post! I love this line... "I think I had hit my quota for classroom spankings already!"...you are too funny. Sorry your Jesus lizard didn't last longer. Look at you...an adorable hawt mess!

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  3. awwww!!!

    i think i would be a little to scared to let a lizard run all over me.

    cats are smart.. haha

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  4. Oh my hell, Suz!! When are you gonna write a book, already?! And, that photo? THAT'S the cover, right there!!

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  5. um. cute pic at the end. :P

    i wasn't sure if you had named your lizard Hey-Soos, or if you were referring to the real deal.

    What a funny post! I'd like to think your cat had nothing to do with his "escape!"

    Happy Monday!

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  6. Oh My Goodness----You don't look like a 'tomboy' at all in that sweet little picture... What a Cutie Pie... You should have been carrying doll babies around--instead of lizards.

    Hope the cats didn't get your "Jesus" lizard.. Maybe he did arise from the dead and get outta there before that little girl captured him and put him back in a jar!!!!!! ha

    Cute post, Suz... Have a great day.
    Hugs,
    Betsy

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  7. awe, how cute. i am glad you didn't think about the cats digging him up sooner. that image of him being alive is magical. great story

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  8. LOL Okay it is official. You have been adorable since forever!

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  9. 'Lizard Whisperer' LOL! Dang cats . . . and oh yeah, you were A-DORABLE, lady!

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  10. He reminds me of the cute Geico guy. Did he have the same accent?
    I am sorry for your loss, and glad that it sounds as if you have recovered. I imagine that your menagerie at home keeps you plenty busy, and gives lots of love. Hugs to you!

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  11. What a great story of you and your pet lizard. Thanks for the smile on my face. And thanks for the picture of the young Lizard Whisperer.

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  12. You are seriously so cute!

    Funny story!

    and I think you're adorable in that little outfit!

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  13. You were so cute!

    (And still are!)

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  14. Hahahaha! This filled me with joy! I would have thought the same thing- Jesus Lizard!

    I love critters, too. I've never taken a lizard to school though-- you are awesome!

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  15. Ha! Love this! I watched a show on lizards last night. They had a Jesus lizard too. He could walk on water!

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  16. Loved the story! In fifth grade my "boyfriend" gave me a garter snake at a school picnic. Needing to hide it from the teacher, I put it in my thermos and closed the lid. That was such a bad idea.

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  17. On my first visit to warmer climes (Spain) many years ago a reptilian creature, or perhaps it was a huge insect, couldn't be certain (I was born and bred on a housing estate) leapt across a restaurant and landed on my knee. I screamed so LONG and so LOUD that the customers thought we were under seige and the owner wanted to evict me from the premises. Suz, it pains me to say it but you and I would not have been friends as children. However, I am past it now and would def. hang out with you. :-)

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  18. sooooooo cute, suz... i am sure mr. gecco remembers you well. after all, he is on tv now doing geico commercials... and he has a british accent so this tells me maybe he didnt speak your language back then...

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  19. Next time put holes in the lid jar and add a cooling fan and some fresh flies?

    *teehee*

    You were SO cute, busy bee!!

    (and brave - lizards, shudder)

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  20. I'm not going to think about what your cats might have done to your dear little lizard.

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  21. BabyFavorite/Susan10/4/10, 9:29 PM

    I have to remember not to read your blog while eating my dinner. I nearly choked to death over your lizard rising from the dead!

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  22. No. Lizards. On. My. Arm. Ever. But good for you!

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  23. You are tooooo funny -- - - but lizards? Yuck! I do not know why people have fascination with reptiles for pets - - - especially snakes. Oh well, God made us all with unique tastes. Thanks for the fun.

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  24. There's nothing hawter than those head scarf thingies from the seventies, that's for sure.

    What an amazing miracle for a child to behold. No wonder you're so delightful now...you have the light of lizard in your life.

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  25. This was poignant, er, um, hilarious!!!!


    He was gone, like Jesus? MWAHAHAHA!


    And to add, "Oh Snap!" was literary genius!!!

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  26. You. Are. Killing Me! I know better than to read your posts at my desk where my bawdy laughter will certainly call me out as not doing Lawyer Work but rather reading much better work than our Associates can muster! You rock. And that photo? Priceless....

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  27. Good Morning,
    Your posts always cheer me up...sorry, I don't always have time for a comment...

    We used to catch the salamanders that lived in my grandma's cellar...Yikes...

    Adorable pic...Have a terrific Tuesday. ~Natalie

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  28. Did you hang the lizard from your ear like an earring? That was one of my many preschool talents.

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  29. i will believe... that it wasn't the cats at all. i think the Jesus lizard is the one who sends you all the critters. and hopefully you hve learned your lesson about carrying lizards in your purse. ok? please, don't ever ask me to look in there...

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  30. You had me at lizard Suz!!! Lol!!! We don't have lizards running around Michigan, but as a little girl I would make my parents buy me those little chameleons - I went thru them by the dozen. I don't understand - maybe I LOVED them to death - ha! But you had the magic jesus lizard - I am so envious you hawt mess you!!!

    P.S. We are seriously sisters. We have to be....

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  31. I was a total tom boy as well. I think it had to do with having two older brothers!

    You look adorable in your mini-dress!

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  32. Aw, you were so cute, all dressed up with your purse.
    It's lucky you thought he was a Jesus lizard when you were seven, or you might have carried a grudge against cats all this time.

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  33. I loved frogs and lizards as a child so understand your joy at having the Jesus lizard even if for just a day. I remember finding a Chameleon one summer and being over the moon about it! I also remember how horrified I was to find him all dried up the next day. Those things are so sensitive. What I'm saying Suz,is, I feel your pain!

    That photo of you is TOO too cute! Was that a matching scarf?? Just adorable.

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